No pirate attack.

We’ve successfully evaded pirates.

PIRATES?! What?! Yes, pirates.

In order to bring the crew member back to safety, we had to go to an old port in Callao, Peru. Apparently, there are quite a few shanty towns near the port and locals will hop on ships and raid them for food, etc. There were some recent raids, so the crew took extra precautions and we were on lockdown from 5:30 until we cleared the port last night.

However, preparations for the port left us feeling a bit agitated, but also humored us. You see, our ship has no guns. Our protection? Fire hoses.

A conversation up on the bow went something like this:
Ronnie: (walking by Julie, Shannon, and Allen with an axe in his hand) Hello.
Shannon: Getting ready for the pirates?
Ronnie: We have to lock all of these up, actually. We're only using the fire hoses. That's a fight we're going to win - fire hoses vs. guns.
All: (laugh)
Ronnie: But we do have enough PVC to make a spud gun!
Shannon: So we'll defend the ship with water and potatoes?
Ronnie: Pirates: Ahhh!! I'm all wet and potatoey! Screw this! I don't want to mess with these Americans!
Allen: That's why they call them "freedom fries."

The ill crew member was placed in the hands of the Peruvian Navy and has since been cleared to fly back to the states where he can get medical care.